HSPs and Anxiety

Imagine there is a motor on the inside of you. Some people have a fast motor and some people a slow motor and then of course there is everything in between. Most people whose motor is too fast experience feelings of anxiety.

You might notice things like...

• Reactive emotionally

• Overwhelmed

• Irritable

• More annoyed or agitated

• Lose creativity

• Might lack focus and feel all over the place

• Maybe you fidget or have to constantly move or stay busy

• You might get stomachaches, headaches or notice pain more in your body, like your back, etc

• And lots more
  

  A fast paced motor = Anxiety
  
  Some people have been anxious their whole life and might not even know there is another way.
  
  Some people go for awhile and do their self care and start feeling better but new stressors come up and they drop their tools and the anxiety motor speeds up.
  
  Or maybe we become unconscious and start watch too much news, or scrolling too much on social media or entering into toxic energy because it can pull us in when we become less conscious.
  
  Or maybe someone needs your help or you think you have to fix them or save them or you believe your value and needs have less worth or you prioritize them as if you don’t have worth and you lose yourself completely.
  
  Imagine that you could turn the dial of this motor.
  
  1. If you could turn the dial down a bit what could that feel like?
  2. Have you felt that way before?
  3. What would your ideal dial button be set at if you could?
  4. What might you have done in the past or can you do now that can help you adjust your dial more optimally? (Not perfectly, just more optimally)

Here were some responses from HSPs in my Sensitive Empowerment Community during a discussion we were having about this that may inspire you…

This is excellent! I feel that "turning the dial down" feels like being in a place of calm. Mindfulness can really help. I have to admit, I have to practice it more! I have definitely felt the high motor setting. I had a high revving motor! I used to be an anxious young adult. Meditation and mindfulness helped me to end anxiety. It helped me find the "eye in the storm". I feel better overall currently. My ideal setting would be medium. My setting can vary, but typically it's on low. I think I burned out in the past and never quite came back. I use my current setting to be in the here and now. I don't have to rush or be endlessly doing stuff. I can be mindfully. When I'm in the here and now, I get what needs to be done better! I wish I understood my sensitivity in the past, but the past is gone. I can only be in the present and be mindful. What I can do now is respect my sensitivity, and not try to make myself go go go. Efficiency and simplicity over busyness and complexity. I'm also trying to minimize my stuff, but I have a ways to go on that!

“I completely relate. I feel like my motor is either on high or low - and it's so hard to hit the sweet spot at medium. The older I've gotten, the less tolerance I have for it being on high - I just hate feeling like I'm buzzing and overwhelmed. I'm slowly learning to love being on low, too. At first it was kind of scary to hang out at low because it felt like sadness, loneliness and boredom. However, with more letting go, I've learned to really relish being in the low mode. I love slow mornings, not rushing, and savoring things. The most important thing I'm realizing lately about adjusting my dial is that it's ok to constantly fine-tune. This means that I may sign up for things when I'm running higher, but then a few days or weeks later I may need to back out or cut back because the activity or commitment is too much or no longer fulfilling - and it's OK! In the past, I felt so much guilt for this, but now I see it just as HSP tweaking.”

“I'm only now starting to realise how hectic things have been previously. I was always going from one thing to the next trying to get it all done! Mindfulness has made a huge difference - just being aware of how I feel when I'm  doing too much on empty.  I have much less tolerance for the higher dial setting now as well and it's taken a long time to be able to turn it down but when I've been able to do this, I'm much more in the present and can feel the calm that goes with it.”

“I love hearing your experiences! I really relate - I also have really reduced my anxiety with mindfulness and meditation. I also feel like I burnt out and have been on low for quite a while now. I am so protective of my time. I love slow quiet time and feel comfortable doing “nothing”. But I want to find a happy medium of stimulation/activity to be around medium. I really love that- simplicity and efficiency. This is what I strive for too :) Also love the idea of fine tuning - I so relate to being excited and signing up then not wanting to at the time! I am better at it but I have always hated making plans too far ahead. I would always think- but how will I know how I feel that day!? And wonder how people do it! I avoid making plans and then don’t get the social time I need so I am working on this and being better at opting out with my wider group of friends (I’m good at it with the closest who I know understand)”

“I would prefer to have a low motor all the time. That is the realization that I have come to from the brain training course. It feels calm and right. But sometimes the motor gets revved like when your car almost breaks down on the highway. Pun intended. I like low but would like to be as comfortable as I can a gear or two higher...”

“I'm listening to my motor today after a long week and feeling depleted. I'm listening to Classic FM radio in bed currently with a cup of tea and gently catching up with myself. I've promised myself I will listen to my energy today and take care of myself. Adjusting my dial to medium is what I'm aiming for and letting go of guilt as I recognise I tend towards swinging between high and low.”

“This is so valuable and pertinent for me today! I recognise I've often lived life at a highly-tuned setting which is exhausting and depleting if done chronically. All the examples you mention resonate. I've been aiming for balance in the past year and am now listening to my body and mind, as I used to over-ride their signals of fatigue. Classical music really helps me slow down and feel calmer I'm also aware that my son's motor is very highly-tuned and he finds it really hard to slow. I think it's a case of feeling uncomfortable with a low. My own fine-tuning and self-care is therefore vital if I'm to support him and model better self-regulation.”

“I can 100% relate to the fast motor and anxiety. I've been dealing with an anxiety disorder for years (and most of my life had some worry/rumination/etc.). If I could turn down the motor a bit, I'd spend more time being (meditating, reading for pleasure, cat naps in the afternoon, being creative in some way - wow, that would be a treat!). Remembering I'm a valued human/partner/dog owner/daughter/sister/aunt/friend even when I'm not just DOING. :)”

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The pull is so strong to be constantly busy I think because our society has somehow sent the message that our value is in our productivity. It's become the norm to be frazzled and constantly busy. I think we can change that message and choose a new one when we are intentional. Try slowing down and see how it feels. Make choices that feel right for you and not based on what everyone else is doing. I think our goal should be to make choices that align with and honor what our sensitive nervous system needs are and to remember that it all exists on a spectrum. What if we paid attention to our body signals and chose our speed based on what feels balanced instead?

We have the best conversations in my Sensitive Empowerment Community. I hope you can come join us! I’m there every day and we do live events every week. Being surrounded by HSPs dedicated to their growth, wellness and empowerment from all over the world is life changing. What steps can you take to live more balanced? I would love to hear from you in the comments below too!

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Take the free Sensitivity Quiz, listen to my HSP podcast, and explore all my resources for HSPs, including my books and online courses at https://www.juliebjelland.com/

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Julie Bjelland is a psychotherapist and founder of Sensitive Empowerment. As a sensitivity expert, her HSP podcast, books, online courses, and Sensitive Empowerment Community have helped thousands of highly sensitive people worldwide reduce their challenges, access and share their gifts, and discover their significant value to thrive to their fullest potential. Known for her ability to teach HSPs proven brain-training tools that work quickly, Julie is on a mission to empower sensitive people to live their best lives. To explore Julie’s valuable HSP resources, including her free Sensitivity Quiz, visit https://www.juliebjelland.com/